All posts by Dr. Charlie Self

Wise Communication for the Workplace: When to Listen and When to Speak

October 16th, 2019 | Dr. Charlie Self

Every day in our workplaces we are surrounded by dissonant conversations, from practical scheduling to salacious gossip, from helpful inquiries to overt subversion of authority by ambitious colleagues. As followers of Jesus, we are probably familiar with biblical passages calling for respect to our employers (“masters” in Ephesians 6 and Colossians 3), and warnings about gossip and unwholesome communication (Ephesians 4). Challenges arise when we are faced with ethical dilemmas concerning our speech, particularly when it concerns our bosses and fellow employees. Leaving aside obvious insults and overt rebellion, friendly joking and celebrations, how do we discern when to be silent and when to speak? Here are eight insights that help us wisely listen and speak in our places of work.

For all our communication: are we unreflectively reacting or wisely responding? Put simply, when we restrain our tongues and pause to consider the situation, our words will be more carefully chosen (Proverbs 10:10; James 3).
Before saying anything critical about a fellow-worker or a boss, have we spoken to them? Jesus’ admonitions in Matthew 5 and 18 help us here: every attempt should be made to make peace before something blows up in public (Proverbs 10:19).
Critical thinking about issues is different than being judgmental toward a person. For example, “I think there may be a better way to craft the budget” is quite distinct from, “Accounting is full of fools with no vision.” The former allows debate toward wisdom; the latter alienates departments and persons (Proverbs 10:32).
Ambition directed toward kingdom ends is healthy. Desiring promotion for fruitful work is not sinful. But political maneuvering at the expense of another’s character or reputation is a serious transgression. “I really want the Director’s chair. I have some ideas that will move us forward and I think I am ready” is acceptable confidence. “We all know he is only a candidate because his friend is the CEO. He is an empty suit.” Even if the latter has some truth, speaking these words poisons the community and cheapens godly aspirations (Proverbs 11:3, 27).
Friendly banter must be distinguished from ungodly gossip. “What a colorful outfit!” must not give way to, “What a peacock!” Again, motive, selection of words, and the tone all contribute to joy or sarcasm (Proverbs 12:14).
When differing with our bosses on matters of importance, the shared mission must be the focus of our critiques. Finding the common starting point places the conversation away from opinions and toward solutions for the good of the organization. Keeping insight #2 in mind, we should make several attempts to convey concerns or divergent thinking privately before bringing our petition to higher authority. Good records of conversations will be essential if we must go over their heads (Proverbs 12:22; 13:15).
Instead of gossiping with peers, we should bring concerns to higher authority only after other avenues have been exhausted. The time frame could be days or months, depending on the issues at hand. Again, our motives must be unselfish and the mission in focus (Proverbs 14:30).
If we have been unfairly targeted by peers, subordinates, or authority figures, staying with the facts, non-judgmental words, and excellent documentation will all help us fight for justice. When we defend ourselves well, we are also advocating for others that could be subject to the same unethical treatment (Daniel 1-6).

As we navigate our workplaces, the Holy Spirit will help us pause and pray, reflect and respond, instead of reacting and regretting our words. We may not win every battle, but we can grow in holy love and inner peace.

Loving our Daily Work

October 7th, 2019 | Dr. Charlie Self

Most people spend most of their waking hours working. Is it possible to enjoy waking up each morning? We need a vision of work that is more than a means to an end.

Work is all meaningful and moral activity apart from leisure and rest. Paid and unpaid, labor and leadership, factory and field, home and office – it all matters to God and our world. Parenting is work! God ordained work BEFORE we fell into sin, commissioning our stewardship of the world and cultivation of creation (Genesis 1-2). Sin has corrupted our work, introducing greed and oppression, sweat and toil (Genesis 3; Ecclesiastes 4; Amos 2, 5 and James 5).

Throughout the Scriptures, creative, diligent, and ethical work is praised. But by the third century of church history, the sacred-secular dichotomy (SSD) was introduced and “spiritual” callings and labors were deemed more sacred that “lay” or “secular” labors. Praise God for dedicated women and men called to lead the Body of Christ and initiate evangelistic and missionary efforts across the street and around the world. They are worthy of honor and financial support (Galatians 6; Philippians 1). But no member of the Body of Christ is unimportant or inferior and no good work is “secular” anymore! Romans 12:1-2 and Colossians 3: 17-24 make it clear that our whole life is worship…and since we spend most of our waking hours working, this must be an offering to God.

Friends, thank you for all your good work, seen and unseen. The Holy Spirit is preparing an awakening unlike anything we have seen for at least 200 years. And one of the keys (along with prayer, repentance, love, and unity) is recognizing that God’s mission takes place through the entire Body of Christ – most of whom work all day/week. We must close the gap between Sunday’s ecstasies and Monday’s ethics, and offer all our daily activities as worship. The same gifts of the Spirit in operation as we gather in churches and homes are available as we go out in mission…at work! In fact, we should expect more supernatural signs as we are outside of religious gatherings, for God wants all to come to faith and Jesus did not perform for religious consumers (see Mark 6 and Luke 7).

We have been involved with a variety of faith and work movements since the early 1990s and we are encouraged by the kingdom progress as ALL classes and cultures, traditions and vocations are now being honored and empowered. Charlie works for Made to Flourish (www.madetoflourish.org), where the focus is empowering pastors and their churches to integrate faith, work, and economic wisdom for the flourishing of their communities. Charlie’s work with AGTS includes leading several initiatives that integrate faith, work and economic wisdom into the curriculum and community of the seminary. AGTS will be hosting its first Faith, Work and Economics Summit on October 15 (www.agts.edu). Charlie is on the steering team for the Oikonomia Network (www.oikonomianetwork.org), a group of colleges, seminaries, and universities equipping present and future ministers with this same integration. We are honored being Board members for Vine Associates, one facet of an amazing mission lead by Brett and Lyn Johnson. They are being used by God to reimagine and refocus mission to include transforming all facets of society (see the sites: www.repurposing.biz and www.inst.net). Charlie is a Board member of Missio Alliance, another network of networks dedicated to reimagining Gospel-centered mission for the 21^st century (www.missioalliance.org). We are also participants and presenters in events sponsored by the Acton institute, dedicated to a free and virtuous society, integrating good intentions and sound economics and uniting women and men of a variety of traditions (www.acton.org)

Let’s offer our day as an act of worship, knowing that today/s discipline is tomorrow’s destiny.

Rightly Ordered Loves, Part 4: Love and Immigration: Hospitality and Security are Possible

September 30th, 2019 | Dr. Charlie Self

The immigration history of the USA includes much prejudice and xenophobia, punctuated by moments of hope and inclusion. During the height of Ellis Island’s embrace of millions (1880s-1910s), Chinese immigrants in California were imprisoned, oppressed, and subject to severe restrictions if they did manage legal status. Heartening narratives of religious and social freedom are unfortunately concomitant with nativism and racism. Maryland was founded in the mid-17^th century as a Roman Catholic refuge. By the 1840s, there were anti-Catholic riots in response to the influx of Irish survivors of the potato famine in their homeland. The open doors of the late 19^th and early 20^th century became the sealed gates of the 1920s to 1940s, with Jewish emigres severely restricted at the height of the Nazi genocide.

Legislation in the 1960s opened the floodgates, with a confusing array of regulations that allowed an influx of students, workers (temporary and permanent), and refugees. At present, some have to wait years for a pathway to citizenship while “undocumented” residents, DACA recipients and others are the recipients of much favor and financial support. The US-Mexico border and adjacent facilities are overwhelmed with people. On the political front, both parties want a steady stream of new arrivals for their economic and political purposes. A large majority of American citizens want reasonable regulation joined with compassion. When the President details the lawbreaking and subversive activities of some at the border, he and his supporters are vilified in the name of compassion. The deep concerns of many concerning racism and oppression of the poor must not be dismissed. Neither party has placed legislation before the White House that ensures hospitable and secure pathways.

Leaving aside the extremes of racial nativism and complete open borders, there are ways forward involving principled compromise…if love is understood properly. Open borders in the name of compassion may involve a loving attitude, but agape love looks at the long-term and will foster equal justice for all. Borders and citizenship are positive principles for a society built on personal virtue and the rule of law. Reasonable security is not the absence of love and regulating the influx of new residents is not the opposite of compassion, but stewardship of resources and institutions.

Agape love can transform the current debate by unmasking the motives and methods of current policies. Families should be kept together and given reasonable time to be heard. But thorough vetting will protect the nation from criminal elements. Agape love is sometimes “tough love” that avoids creating generations of welfare dependents and residents that refuse any assimilation into the values and vision of a pluralistic society. Agape love considers all facets of social flourishing and fosters structures of inclusion and wisdom. Agape love also helps people make friends across cultural divides and offers uniting virtues that help citizenship be unity-in-diversity.

Immigration reform is not an unsolvable problem, if unselfish love guides policy. Alas, greed and power often overtake true love. Future generations deserve better, as we welcome people from every corner of our world to help our nation flourish.

Rightly Ordered Loves, Part 3: Sexual Sanity

September 23rd, 2019 | Dr. Charlie Self

When historians look back at some of the moral currents of the early 21^st century, they will call it an “era of anthropological confusion.” It is good that we are no longer imprisoning consenting adults for private activity and that there is robust dialogue of gender and sexual identity and practice.

I have forthright opinions of sexual identity and morality; however, these are not the focus of this essay. Persuading folks that disagree with my Christian convictions is better done in civil, personal dialogue or in lengthy communication. Here I want to argue that all sides of the current disputes on gender and sexual identity and practice are missing an important factor as they seek to persuade, or, in some cases, coerce conformity to their understanding of what is moral and tolerable.

The mistake our entire culture is making on sexuality is profound: we have made Eros the Almighty and sexual pleasure the defining characteristic of human identity. This is tragically deficient anthropology, reducing identity to one’s current sexual proclivities. There are great complexities involved in how people feel and think about gender and sex, and no one should feel marginalized. We do, however, need to dialogue on these issues, especially regarding the education of children, without labeling and libeling those who disagree with us.

If agape love is our starting point, then other loves will find their place. Agape compels thoughtfulness concerning our loyalties and pleasures, our motives and our practices. At this juncture I am only calling for thoughtfulness about sacrificial love. Agape sees people as made in God’s image, worthy of dignity and respect. Agape love helps people not objectify others or abuse people for pleasure. Friendships rooted in mutual interests are possible without the intrusion of unwelcome erotic demands. Comradery in a cause can include people of all orientations and persuasions as they sacrifice for the common good.

We are more than our erotic passions, wonderful as they are (in boundaries of morality and mutuality). Choosing self-restraint is not repression, but a loving decision. People of all persuasions can offer their best efforts toward the common good. There is still a place for debating gender and sexual issues in an environment of love and respect. Even where we radically disagree, a commitment to sacrificial love allows us to unite for noble causes.

Will we stop bowing before idols of immediate pleasure and choose noble pathways of love and service? Can we debate without rancor and stop labeling and libeling? Our preferred future depends upon a social compact of principled liberty for all.

Rightly Ordered Loves, Part 2: Justice is Social and Racial Peace is Possible

September 17th, 2019 | Dr. Charlie Self

“Social justice” is a loaded term. For liberals and progressives, it is a summative refrain containing their concerns for economic, gender, and racial equity, including much more governmental intervention righting historic wrongs. For conservatives, it has become a byword, representing ideologies and policies antithetical to human freedom and flourishing.

Justice is social! At its root, justice is well-ordered relationships – in business, personal interactions, political policy, and international relations. Justice implies fairness, but it is more than a legal referee. Justice includes access, equity, and opportunity in a civil society containing freedom of conscience and equal rights.

It is time to change our language and simply use the term, “Justice.” As we do, we will find that justice is inseparable from well-ordered loves. The desire for fairness is innate: no one has to teach a child to say, “no fair!” When we see oppression and violence, indignation rises within and we want to protect the innocent and punish the guilty. When we see discrimination, we heartily oppose such practices and want everyone to have opportunity to thrive.

Agape love and true justice are inseparable. Both involve deep reflection on the values and virtues underneath true freedom. Justice without love devolves to legalities without nuance and consideration of the whole person or situation. A sense of affection or compassion without justice becomes diluted mercy that endangers civil order and denigrates personal responsibility.

When we choose agape love and aim for holistic justice, reparations for slavery and Jim Crow move from the temporary redistribution of wealth to transformation of relationships and systems that ensure a better future for all while confronting the past. Banking, food, and job deserts are unacceptable. It is unconscionable that given equal brilliance and empirical data, that a small fraction of venture capital finds its way to African American entrepreneurs.

Justice and love will lead toward racial reconciliation that does not replace one form of hatred with another. Justice and agape love open the doors to fearless self-examination and evaluation of all economic and social systems. Individual iniquity is revealed, and repentance is possible. Institutional injustice is unveiled and repealed. There is hope when we choose a difference vision.